May 1, 2007

Labor Pains

In honor of International Labor Day—or whatever they call the holiday that is currently allowing me to have a free day—I decided to complain a bit about work. How very Lumpenproletariat of me.
Anyhow, teaching at the school was really going great last year, but then this year the Powers That Be decided to restructure the English department. They thought that it would be a good idea if each grade had two teachers, so they could hear two accents. Um…huh? Basically, as often happens when the Powers That Be bumble around a bit, things got pretty shitty. I have the same number of work hours but almost twice as much work as last year, since I now have twice as many groups to teach. That’s why I am teaching grades 5, 6 (A and B), 7, 8, 9, 10, and 11. It sounds like a lot, and it is, because after a certain point, you stop giving a shit, and everyone’s worse off.
Anyhow, the best thing about it all is that the Powers That Be is really just a kind of board of directors for the school and—surprise, surprise—of the seven members, only one is a teacher, and she doesn’t speak English. The others are just investors.
So, I’ve helped join the English department hissy fit, and have threatened to quit a few times. At the very least, I’ll quit in December if they think of continuing this hare-brained division of labor for the next school year. That would leave me without a job, though, and that’s a bit troubling because I’m not really qualified to do…anything. Most of my jobs have been geared towards building an interesting-sounding resume, and I guess I’d have to add “technician” or “engineer” to make them seem more interesting. Like:
--“Dog Kennel Cleaner” changes to “Shit Shoveling Technician”
--“Bus Driver” changes to “Transportation Engineer”
--“Dairy Worker” changes to “Hand-Up-A-Cow’s-Ass Technician”
--“German Teacher” turns into “Nazi-Jokes Deflection Specialist”
--“English Teacher” changes to “Whine Absorption Manager”
Anyhow, if anyone knows of any sweet jobs opening up in the Central Valley region of Costa Rica—especially if they pay well and allow me to play LEGO Star Wars and/or eat ice cream at my desk—send me an email as soon as possible.

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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hi Ryan,

it sounds quite bad with all the teaching, but I am sure you will sort it out or rather sort the Powers That Be out. As you know I am waiting for the great novel to appear, so start writing it! The world will be so much happier when they have read it!
Your fan-club in Germany
Maj & Co.